Monday, February 15, 2010

I needed to rant a little.

I really need to get this off my chest at the moment. I am sitting here in my room upset because I just ended a fight with my parents. I am surprised to be in the position I am right now because I never expected my parents to fight with me over something as silly as this. I basically told my mom that I was getting my septum pierced. No big deal, right? I am eighteen years old, I have the money and I already have my nose and tragus pierced. And I have a tattoo. My parents are so open-minded except for about piercing and tattoos (I just found out). I am in shock right now because they told me that if I get it done not only will I be ugly but I better not expect anything from them (money, shelter, food, etc). It hurts me that my parents (who’ve since I was little have told me to always be myself and that they would always accept me no matter what) have suddenly changed their minds(?). I don’t understand how they can support me in things only they like or believe in but not in things they don’t. I know some parents are like that but never my parents. This is the first time they have made me choose between something like a piercing over their support both financial and emotional. I really don’t understand what the problem is. It is a silly little piercing that can be removed..why are they making a big deal of it?! Especially since I go to an amazing tattoo and piercing shop that is completely clean and have such talented employees.

On another note my main problem is with my mom. Lately, I’ve felt completely disconnected from my family especially her. It’s because she does not agree with my lifestyle. She is an intellect who works at a University and I am completely opposite of her. I hate school, I love fashion and I am extremely girly. I like to read magazines, go shopping, oh and now and then get something pierced. I accept that she is who she is but for some reason she cannot accept who I am. Of course she thinks she is subtle about it but she isn’t. For one she constantly makes fun of people who like fashion, make-up, etc. To her it is not a proper profession or even something to spend time on. She makes fun of it and therefore is making fun of me. It is stressful feeling like you can’t talk to your family about what you love because they make fun of it or think it’s stupid. My older sister is their accomplishment, their token child. She is exactly what they want in a child. And I am the moodier, quiet, completely different child. Let’s just say I have some lifetime resentment built up. So anyways I am sorry to ramble on about this but it does help.

Why do they say that I should always be myself but end up making fun of who I am. May I quote my dad who said “That’s not who you are” that being someone who gets piercings. How does he know who I am! I think only I know who I am. And I want to get this piercing because it is a way I can express myself. If you hate piercings and think they are dumb then that’s your opinion and I understand it but you can’t force someone to think like you. I understand where they are coming from but in the end it is about me and who I am. I can’t give up who I am or what I want just because they think it’s dumb or improper. It’s not like I want to shoot up or kill someone. I live in a house where I am given the freedom to be myself but only if myself is what they want.

I would love to hear your input on this or even your own stories. I am sure I am not alone on this. I am hoping my parents will change their mind and understand where I am coming from and this is who I am. I am getting this piercing regardless of what they think I just hope they won’t let it come in between us and ruin our relationship.

Thanks for reading. I know it is long but it was something I just needed to do.

xx
Sarah


Hayley Williams from Paramore ♥


7 Comments:

Blogger streetlighteyes said...

I know this feeling well. My dad is completely uptight when it comes to body modifications. When I was 18 I got my septum pierced & he was really not happy. I am 21 and to this day he still tells me I look ugly with my 'bull ring'.

When I got my first tattoo, I didn't tell my dad because I knew he wouldn't approve. But with two older siblings who both have tattoos, I told my mum. I told her how big it was going to be and showed her the design and she seemed fine with it all. When I got it done, however, she snapped and yelled at me for days.

It's hard to know how parents are going to react at the best of times.

Hope you feel better soon!

xx

February 16, 2010 at 1:13 AM  
Blogger Charlie ♥ said...

i'm eighteen and i live at home at the moment before i go university. i know exactly how you are feeling in that despite the fact that i am an adult they still feel the need to restrict me because i live in their house.

all i can say is, parents always overreact and say stupid things with contradict what they said earlier. my mum and dad have always been laid back about piercings tattoos etc. so im pretty lucky. however, i know this isnt really similar, but i smoke, and as an adult i have a right to do so. they let me smoke seeing as they cant stop me, and i respect them and dont do it in my room or near the house, i walk the dog to have one. however, my mum chooses EVERY POSSIBLE OPPURTUNITY to criticize it. its understandable she wants me to be healthy, but its not her choice, its mine. like i observed how i think its disgusting that parents smoke around their kids and she immidiatly hits back that i'll probably do that, indicating i have those types of morals. also with universitys she tried everything in her power to force me towards bristol, where she went, despite the fact i wanted to go leeds, which i love because its a fashion city. she critized leeds saying it was dirty, chavvy and a crappy uni, which wasnt the right way to go about getting her way at all, but i guess she thought she was doing what was best for me.


lol i seem to have had a little rant aswell, but what i mean is that parents are people too, and can only be human. they dont want you to do it so theyll say stupid things like what they said to you to try and get their own way. you be who you want to be, you know that fashion isnt stupid and isnt to be scorned and its a very respectable interest, so dont listen to anything they say.

(and btw, my parents are always making threats to kick me out or cut off their support, but its an idle threat. i cant comment on your parents, but im guessing they wouldnt do something so drastic over something so petty!)


hope this helped, feel better soon xx

www.vampires-and-cardigans.blogspot.com

February 16, 2010 at 5:17 AM  
Blogger Lu said...

I know how this feels chica. I've got 12 piercings (4 in the lobe of each ear, tragus, cartilage of one ear, inner conch (so pretty, I wear small flower studs in it) and my nose.

Think I was 13 when I got my nose done, I didn't even ask my parents (they would've said no), I just did it then told them after, same with conch and tragus. They went abit mad with my nose.

At the end of the day, it's your body, you have to do whatever makes YOU happy. Be true to yourself. xXx

February 16, 2010 at 7:13 AM  
Blogger kirstyb said...

its only because she wants you to have the best in life she prob just doesnt understand fashion! as for the piercings and tattoos im 24 ad my mum would murder me if i got any piercings on my face etc. She cried when i was 23 and she realised i had tattoos! i guess we will only understand when we have kids lol xoxoxox

February 16, 2010 at 7:39 AM  
Blogger Pink Flower said...

Ah this makes me sound old saying the "when I was your age" kinda line me and my mam were totally talk and cheese we just had no common ground and i donno, we just never clicked - its a lot different now but maybe that just comes with age and just being more relaxed with each other.

While I have tattoo's my parents are and would be totally be against me getting piercings even though i'm 23 they would just react so very badly to it. They might see a piercing as something that would detract from your beauty then adding to it.

February 16, 2010 at 12:12 PM  
Blogger SammyKins said...

My mu is EXACTLY the same...you just got to show them how good you are at fashion, and how passionate you are about what you do. My mum was the same with me, she is a doctor or her ward and is very intellectual and thought i couldn't make a living out of art and fashion. Until she saw my work, and now she encourages it

hope this helps sweetie, chin up and remember me love you!

love sammy

www.sammy-living-in-sin.blogspot.com

xxxx

February 16, 2010 at 2:17 PM  
Blogger sarah xo said...

Thanks for all the feedback darlings! It really made me feel better. ♥

February 17, 2010 at 8:53 PM  

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